Success Follow Action

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. Vince Lombardi

What do all successful people have in common?

Well, if you read the title of this piece, then you know the answer is action.

Before I go on, I want to make one thing very clear. I’m using the word success broadly to define achieving a result you personally define and not some pre-determined commercial view of success.

If you observe a person that you consider to be successful, you’ll soon see that they have a bias for action. They’re always thinking about or working towards their goals. Sometimes their actions are imperceptible, but they know that even tiny actions have the power to compound over time. You’ll also see that they act because they know that they will learn only by acting even when they’re afraid.

You see, not only does success follow action, but it is also attracted to action.

But why is success attracted to action?

Because when you act, you generate energy, you propel yourself towards your goals.

Does taking action guarantee success?

The honest answer is no. It doesn’t.

But not taking action guarantees failure to succeed.

So, the next time you’re contemplating a goal or thinking about an area of your life where you’d like to see success, once you’re done thinking, then start acting. Become the person that success is attracted to.

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Why Let That Stop You?

If your why is strong enough you will figure out how!  Bill Walsh

Why let that stop you?

What is that?

The that is the obstacles or hurdles between you and your goals. And the obstacles are unique to you and what you’re attempting to accomplish.

Now obviously, there are some limitations, whether they are rules, regulations, or the laws of physics, that might prevent you from achieving certain goals. For example, if you’re twenty years old, you’ll not be able to remain in high school because it’s against the regulations. But that shouldn’t prevent you from learning.

When you’re in pursuit of a goal, you only have one job, and that is to overcome or eliminate each obstacle as it arises. And believe me when I say, if you’re pursuing anything worthwhile, you will encounter obstacles.

So, how do you eliminate the obstacles?

Sorry, but I can’t help you with that because, as I said, they are unique to you. But I can recommend a perspective that might help you. The answer lies in the question, why let that stop you? If you guessed it’s the ‘why,’ then you’re correct.

If you can answer the why, then you’re on your way to overcoming that.

So, the next time you bump up against an obstacle on your way towards your goals, remind yourself why you’re pursuing them. You’ll find that if your why is strong and means enough to you, then you won’t let ‘that’ stop you.

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Relative Deprivation

We won’t be distracted by comparison if we are captivated with purpose. Bob Goff

How can you miss something you’ve never had?

Well, apparently, you can, and the phenomenon is called relative deprivation. It’s a close cousin of FOMO (fear of missing out) but not quite the same.

While FOMO is the feeling you have that you’re missing out on the fun that others are having or that others have better lives or experiences than you’re having, relative deprivation is when you feel deprived of a thing or an activity that you may not have even considered.

For example, you might hear a friend or colleague speaking about a luxurious vacation they took and then feel as though your vacations no longer satisfy you. Relative deprivation is rooted in the feeling that other people have things that you don’t, and you begin to think that you too should have them.

If you look carefully, you’ll quickly realize that the culprit of relative deprivation happens when you begin to compare your life to the lives of other people.

So how do you avoid the feeling of relative deprivation?

Well, one way is to isolate yourself from everyone and avoid any interaction with the outside world. But that would be a little extreme.

Realistically speaking, avoiding the feeling of relative deprivation requires you to work on yourself. It requires you to know what you want out of life. Once you know what you want, you’re not as easily lured into comparing what you have with what others have and do because you are confident on your own path.

So, the next time you find yourself feeling as though you’re missing something you never thought you wanted or had, you’ll know that you’re experiencing the phenomenon of relative deprivation. And to cure yourself of this feeling, re-center yourself and remind yourself that your life is about doing and getting what you want, and not in comparing your life to the lives of other people.

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Akrasia

If you think about the long term then you can really make good life decisions that you won’t regret later. Jeff Bezos

How often do you struggle with akrasia?

While akrasia might sound like a strange rash that needs medical attention, it’s not. Akrasia means to act against one’s better judgment.

So, let me rephrase my original question.

How often do you act against your better judgment?

Why do you continue to do things that you know aren’t good for you?

The answer in many cases is that you’re either seeking pleasure or avoiding pain in the short term. If this sounds like a simplistic explanation, then let’s take a moment to explore it.

Have you ever attempted to eat healthier only to find yourself succumbing to the temptation of foods that you know aren’t good for you?

Have you ever said words out of anger or pain that you’ve later regretted?

Have you ever spent more money than you know you should have?

These are just a few examples of behaving against your best long-term interests.

Now I understand that you’re human, and in being so, you are fallible like all of us. We all, on occasion, act in ways that are future self’s regret. But what if there’s a way to minimize the regret?

Notice I didn’t say eliminate the regret. Because for that, you’d have to be a perfect human, and I’m quite sure that person doesn’t exist.

One way to live a life that aligns you with your best interest is to secure a strong image of the person you want to be. Carving out a strong identity provides you with a template, a guide that you can turn to when faced with situations where you might act against your best interest. For example, if you begin to identify yourself as the person who lives within their means, you mitigate your vulnerability to overspending.

While this might sound simple, we both know that it’s not easy.

Is it worth the effort?

That’s a question only you can answer. But if you ask me, then I would ask you. If you don’t act in your own best interest, then who will?

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Raison D’être

The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for. Fyodor Dostoevsky

What is your raison d’être?

If you’re not familiar with the phrase, then here’s the definition. Raison d’être is a French word that means your reason or justification for existence.

Now I understand that you might not know or have not explored your reason or the justification for your existence, and that’s okay. It can be daunting to think about such a big question. But don’t let that intimidate you.

Searching for or thinking about your reason for existing can be a lifelong journey, and there isn’t always one answer to the question. And the answer can change depending on the stage of life you’re going through. If you ask a teenager and seventy-year-old their reasons for existing, you’ll likely get two very different answers because they have different priorities.

Occasionally, you’ll come across a unique individual who knows their reason for being from a very early age. But this is an exception, not the norm.

Thinking about your raison d’être is more about self-exploration than coming up with concrete answers. It’s about allowing yourself to follow your curiosity and to see what interests you. It’s about casting a wide net.

Finding your reason for existence is not a requirement of life, but it helps give your life direction. And when you have direction, you have meaning because you’re moving towards something.

So, set aside some time today or this week and think about your raison d’être. Let your mind wander and think about what’s interested you in the past or what you’re curious about today. Once you have a few answers, permit yourself to pursue them. And if, after doing so, you don’t find your reason for existence, that’s okay. Maybe our reason for existence is in the exploration and not in the finding.

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Earworm

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results. Willie Nelson

What was the last song you had stuck in your head?

If you’re not familiar with the concept of an earworm, then here’s a definition for you. An earworm is a catchy and/or memorable piece of music or saying that continuously occupies a person’s mind even after it is no longer being played or spoken about.

While earworms are almost always related to music, you also have other earworms that, if given the opportunity, can continuously occupy your mind.

Unfortunately, the earworms I’m alluding to aren’t as positive as a catchy song or tune. They’re the earworms where you’re playing back recent arguments or heated discussions that you’ve had. You know the ones where you can’t believe they said that to you. The ones where you’ve felt disrespected, demeaned, and in some cases, even unloved.

Experts, yes, there are experts studying earworms, recommend that one of the best ways to get rid of an earworm is to replace it with another piece of music. The great thing about this technique is that you can also use it to eliminate emotional earworms.

When you ruminate on a conversation that causes you to feel a negative emotion, you’re essentially giving oxygen to it and allowing the earworm to grow stronger in your mind. As the old saying goes, energy goes where attention flows. So, to quiet down or eliminate the negative earworm, you should re-focus your attention on positive or other uplifting conversations you’ve had.

I know, it’s easier said than done, but what’s your other option? Keep playing the negative conversation in your head?

So, the next time you find yourself stuck with a negative earworm playing in your mind, you now have a choice to make. Keep it going and continue reliving the negative conversation or drown it out by replacing it with positive, mood-enhancing thoughts.

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Would You Rather?

No matter what the situation, remind yourself, I have a choice.
– Deepak Chopra

Have you ever played the game? Would you rather?

If yes, then great. If not, then here’s a quick explanation.

It’s a game mostly played by children, and it consists of questions where you must choose between two, usually painful or gross, options. For example, would you rather lick a dirty trash can or the bathroom floor?

It’s a fun game, and there are no winners or losers. Except if you have a vivid imagination and a weak stomach, then you might find yourself grossed out over the idea of having to choose between living in a house with five million cockroaches or a house with five million flies.

But why am I writing about would you rather?

Good question.

You see, you can use the game to assist you with reaching your personal life goals.

Very often, choices in life seem as though they are binary. They are go, no go, do, don’t do, but that’s not always the case. And if you’re the kind of person that struggles with difficult, cut, and dry decisions, then this is good news for you because now you can use, would you rather.

Here are a few examples of how you can use the question.

If it’s health you’re pursuing then, would you rather take a long or short walk? Or would you rather have a piece of cake or a bite of cake?

If you’re pursuing financial goals, then would you rather save a dime or a dollar?

If it’s a mindfulness goal, then would you rather meditate for five or thirty minutes?

It’s almost as if the question is a win-win for you.

Of course, using the question might take you longer to accomplish your goals, but at least you’ll be consistent in your actions, which means you’ll always be moving towards them.

So, the next time you find yourself debating between two opposing choices that lead you towards or away from your goals, reframe your perspective to consider more or less of a positive action. Use the would you rather question to manipulate your thinking and to keep you on track.

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Pre-Mortem

Always ask yourself if what you’re doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow. Paulo Coelho

When was the last time you conducted a pre-mortem on any area of your life?

If you’re not sure what a pre-mortem is, then let me help you.

Here’s the best definition I’ve found for a pre-mortem. “A pre-mortem, or premortem, is a managerial strategy in which a project team imagines that a project or organization has failed, and then works backward to determine what potentially could lead to the failure of the project or organization.” (Wikipedia)

Now you might be wondering why I’m asking you about applying a business strategy to your life. And that’s a good question. But, if you think about it for a moment, you’ll soon realize that your life is very similar to an organization made up of many projects.

Let’s walk through a few examples together.

I’m going to start with health because I believe it’s the foundation to a good life. If I were to ask you, how does a person’s health deteriorate or fail, barring any unforeseen events such as diseases beyond a person’s control, what answers would you give me?

I think we would both agree that lack of exercise, poor diet, and maybe even lack of sleep as contributing factors that would lead to poor health if continued over time.

What if I asked you about poor financial health? Perhaps overspending, lack of financial knowledge would be a couple of factors we would agree upon.

What about relationships? Ignoring friends and family, taking people for granted, or even egocentric self-centeredness might all be contributing factors to poor relationships.

All three of these areas we’ve looked at can be viewed as projects, and while applying a pre-mortem strategy to them might not guarantee success, it will help mitigate the risk of failure.

So, take some time today to think about the areas of your life that you feel are important to you and conduct a pre-mortem. Identify the potential weak or failure points and begin to take actions that will increase the probability of success in the most important project you’ll ever work on – your life.

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Simple Pleasures

Simple pleasures are the last healthy refuge in a complex world.
Oscar Wilde

How often do you stop and appreciate the simple pleasures in life?

It’s great to pursue big goals and life-changing events, but it’s also good and, in some cases, even more, important to appreciate the simple pleasures in life.

What are simple pleasures?

Psychologists define them as brief, positive experiences, emerge in everyday settings, and are accessible to most people at little or no cost. Simple pleasures are known as mini moments of happiness and joy—the perfect mood boosters.

But the key to appreciating simple pleasures is that you must first look for them. Fortunately, there’s not a one-size-fits-all, so you can find and enjoy simple pleasures that are unique to your life.

A simple pleasure for you could be something as simple as getting a green light at a busy intersection or a message from a friend or loved one.

You can consider the act of noticing and appreciating simple pleasures in life as emotional speed bumps that force you to pay attention just for a moment or two and allow you to slow down from the pace of daily life.

So, as you go through your day today, try to notice the simple pleasures in your life. Allow yourself to mentally step away and take a moment to appreciate them. And don’t worry, whatever you’re working on or wherever you’re going will still be there when you check back in.

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Staying Motivated

People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.
Zig Ziglar

How do you stay motivated?

At its core, motivation is rooted in escape or, said differently, the desire to change.

The two drivers for motivation are dissatisfaction with the current state and the hope or vision that things can get better. Without these drivers, there is no motivation.

Dissatisfaction with how things are doesn’t necessarily mean unhappiness, although it can. It can also come from a feeling or knowing that you can improve on your current circumstances.

Then there’s hope. You might have heard the Bible verse, “without vision, the people will perish.” Well, hope and vision are related. Hope is the thought, the idea of a better future. But for hope to help you stay motivated, your vision of your future must be transformative. It must be big enough to pull you towards it regardless of the challenges you’ll face along the way.

According to research, there are three components of motivation. They are activation, persistence, and intensity. Obviously, there’s no movement without activation, but the key, the linchpin, is persistence. Your intensity will wax and wane based on many factors, but you must maintain a level of consistency. Use your vision of your future to help you stay consistent.

So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where your motivation to accomplish a goal or task is fading, go back and revisit why you started down that path in the first place. Find the reasons that prompted you to want to make a change in your life and see if they’re still valid, and move you towards change. If they are, then re-ignite your motivation by refocusing on your vision and move consistently towards it.

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Fit In or Stand Out

When you become tired of fitting in, is when you truly become yourself. Ric Ocasek

Do you want to fit in or stand out?

You must choose because you can’t do both.

Fitting in and standing out are two separate paths that require very different kinds of thinking and actions.

To be clear, neither is right or wrong, and they both come with their own set of opportunities and challenges.

If fitting in is your thing, then playing it safe is your game. Coloring between the lines, doing what you’re told to do, essentially not making any waves, complying to and with the status quo. There’s a sense of security that comes with fitting in, and that’s why most people choose this path.

However, if you want to stand out, then the first thing you should prepare for is rejection. This might sound a little harsh, but it’s because those whose thoughts and actions rock the boat and challenge the status quo are often rejected by those that are comfortable with the current system.

Now I know I said you couldn’t do both, but maybe I was exaggerating a little. What you can do is be situationally aware and decide when to stand out appropriately. Because if all you do is rebel, you’ll quickly find yourself locked up in a room by yourself. One of the ways to be situationally aware is learning to be chameleon-like, adapting to your environment, and then looking for opportunities to stand out if you choose to do so. Of course, do keep in mind and calculate the inherent risks associated with standing out.

So, while I don’t want to recommend which path you should take, I do want you to know that if you want to experience any autonomy over your own life, then you’ll need to be non-compliant and stand out. There will be the risk of rejection when you do so, but the reward of being your own person well outweighs the risks.

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Self-Deprecation

You have to love yourself or you'll never be able to accept compliments from anyone. Dean Wareham

How well do you take a compliment?

Do you accept it and enjoy the moment or reply with some form of self-deprecation?

Self-deprecation may be beneficial when socializing because you’ll be seen as humble but, in your effort to do so, there’s a danger that you’ll be sowing the seeds of self-sabotage and unworthiness.

Your self-confidence is grounded in the language you use to describe yourself, not only to others but also to yourself. So, what happens when someone compliments you, and you downplay it with a nonchalant, ‘it’s nothing, or no big deal’ is that you begin to believe this about yourself.

Accepting a compliment can be difficult, particularly in certain cultures where you’re taught that pride is a vice and humility is a virtue to strive for. And this might be true in some cases, especially when you’re trying to fit in, be likable and make others around you feel comfortable. But there’s a cost to downplaying yourself.

Imagine for a moment that every time a friend or colleague accomplished something in their lives, instead of praising them, you downplayed their achievements. How popular would you be with them? I think you’d soon find yourself with fewer friends. Well, this is what you’re doing to yourself when you self-deprecate and deflect compliments.

Now I’m not suggesting or recommending that you become braggadocios and flaunt your accomplishments at every opportunity you get because that too can and probably will have negative consequences in your social life. Instead, find a balance between being humble and, at the same time, proud of who you are.

So, the next time someone compliments you, don’t deflect with self-deprecation. Accept it with humility and gratitude. Allow yourself to feel worthy of the kind words they’re expressing, and hopefully, over time, you’ll begin to believe that you’re deserving of the compliments you receive.

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Ask For It

Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it! Maya Angelou

How often do you ask for what you want?

You might have heard the often quoted and popular Bible verse, “Ask, and you shall receive.” But, while asking is the bridge to almost anything you want out of life, you must first be willing to ask.

The act of asking requires courage because in doing so, you’re setting yourself up for rejection and even perhaps a sense of failure. Rejection is hard to handle especially if you take it personally. But it doesn’t need to be that way.

When you don’t ask for what you want, there’s often an underlying theme that you don’t feel as though you deserve to do so. So then, you self-sabotage yourself by not asking or asking from a position of weakness. You do this by saying to yourself something along the lines of, ‘they’ll probably say no.’

One way to get over the fear of asking is to understand that there’s a distinction between what you ask for and who you are. When you understand that there’s a clear delineation between you and your request, you’ll begin to realize that it’s your request that might be denied and not you. This enables you not to take the rejection personally.

Learning to ask for what you want is a superpower that you have the opportunity to work on at any stage in life. However, the sooner you learn to ask for what you want, the higher the probability is that you’ll begin to receive it.

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Overthinking

Worrying about how things might go wrong, doesn’t help things to go right. – Karen Salmansohn

How much overthinking do you do?

When you find yourself ruminating over a thought, rarely is it a positive one. Positive or happy thoughts are inclined to evaporate quickly. It’s the negative thoughts that stick around.

The negative thoughts are the ones that snowball into imagined scenarios of doom and gloom.

Why does this occur?

There isn’t one specific reason you’re more prone to thinking about negative thoughts over positive ones, but your survival instinct plays a major role. Your brain is continuously calculating what-if scenarios, and it’s these scenarios that tend to get out of control. These out-of-control thoughts are also often the foundation for anxiety.

So how do you apply the brakes to negative thoughts before they become the mountain out of a molehill?

One way to reduce time spent on negative thoughts is to counterbalance your thinking. Actively looking for things that are going well for you and being grateful for them can help redirect the energy you’re spending on negative thoughts. Yes, this takes work, but it will get easier with practice like any other form of exercise.

Another way to prevent yourself from overthinking a problem is to give yourself a set time during which you’re allowed to think about the situation. This might sound like it’s not possible, and to some degree, you’re correct because it’s impossible to switch off your brain. But setting a time allows you to go into problem-solving or brainstorming mode. During the time you’ve allotted yourself, write down all the possible solutions and outcomes to the problem you’re thinking about. Doing this will alleviate your mind from carrying the burden and might allow you to approach the situation with less emotion and more logic.

So, the next time you find yourself overthinking a problem, consider using a technique or two to prevent yourself from sliding down the slippery slope towards negative thinking. Doing so might prevent you from experiencing the pain of issues that don’t even exist.

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Life’s Not Fair

The only thing that makes life unfair – the delusion that it should be fair. – Dr. Steven Maraboli

What does it mean for life to be fair?

You’ve probably said it, or at least thought it, and for sure, you’ve heard other people say, life’s not fair.

But what does it mean for life to be fair?

For life to be fair, does it mean life should be equal for everyone?

It doesn’t take but a minute of thinking to conclude that’s not possible. To be clear, I’m not suggesting that there shouldn’t be opportunities for those that seek them. Still, even with opportunities present, people will succeed at different levels based on their abilities.

As children, we’re taught about being fair by sharing or in the way we treat others, which are both wonderful lessons and qualities to have. But with that lesson comes a downside, a belief that you will also be treated fairly, which as an adult, you realize is not always true.

The biggest problem with the idea of life being fair, is fair to whom? Fairness is based on an individual’s idea of what is right and wrong. It’s based on how life should be based on personal beliefs and values. And with the current world population at nine billion-ish and counting, that’s a lot of ideas about what’s fair and what’s not.

So, at the risk of sounding pessimistic, which I’m not, I do want to recommend that the sooner you can accept that life isn’t fair, emotionally speaking, the better off you’ll be. You’ll be more adept at handling the peaks and, more important, the valleys that you’ll inevitably experience in life. And, when things in life aren’t working for you or not going as planned, you won’t resort to asking why life isn’t fair. Because you’ll know that idea of life being fair is just an idea, a mirage.

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What Could Be

The major key to your better future is you. Jim Rohn

How do you move from what is, to what could be?

Why would you want to?

Well, you don’t have to, especially if you’re satisfied with how things currently are.

But, if you’re not, then this is for you.

The first step in thinking about what could be is giving yourself the permission to tap into your imagination and allow yourself to dream. The idea of giving yourself permission might sound strange, but there are many among us that kill their dreams the minute they’re born. If you listen carefully, you can hear it in their language. Phrases like, I could never do that, or that’s not the kind of person I am, are telltale signs of dream killers.

If or hopefully when you decide to allow yourself to tap into your imagination, then you’ve set the machine of what could be in motion.

Once your imagination is in motion, now your next step is to capture the products or, in this case, the ideas it generates. And capture them without judging them. Remember, this is the dream phase, so let your imagination run freely.

After you’ve let your imagination generate a set of ideas, now it’s time to sort or prioritize the ones you want to pursue. Don’t discard the others. They might come in useful later.

While letting your imagination run free and capturing ideas are extremely important, this next step might be the most important. Set aside your concerns, doubts, and fears, and act on an idea you have. Even small, imperceptible action counts. This is for you and not for anyone else to see. When you act, you build confidence, and you’re also rewarding your imagination. You’re building a virtuous cycle for yourself.

As you continue to act, you’ll learn and course-correct when needed. Then the magic will begin to unfold as you’ll find yourself moving from what is towards what could be.

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Dissatisfaction

Be dissatisfied enough to improve, but satisfied enough to be happy.-- J. Harold Smith

How complicit are you in contributing to your dissatisfaction?

Dissatisfaction with what?

Well, it depends.

Where in your life do you feel as though you’re lacking, falling behind, or not as good as others?

Now you might push back and say that you’re dissatisfied not because you’re comparing your life to others and that you have an intrinsic desire to do better. And I’ll give you that for a moment.

But, how do you know what better is?

If you lived your life completely isolated from any other human, your main concern would be survival. So, food, water, shelter, that’s it.

Doing better is a learned idea.

Don’t get me wrong. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to do better. In fact, I encourage it. There are very few things that bring more personal satisfaction than self-improvement. But there’s a difference, perhaps nuanced, between self-improvement and dissatisfaction. The former is based on you wanting to become better, while the latter focuses on what you aren’t or don’t have.

I understand it’s easy to be dissatisfied, especially since you’re constantly shown and reminded by the media about all the things you don’t have. It’s almost as though you’re forced to see all that’s missing in your life.

If you’re interested in tamping down your sense of dissatisfaction, then you should learn to focus on all that you have and begin to eliminate sources that make you feel as though you have a hole in your life and leaves you in a constant state of comparison to others.

So, the next time you find yourself feeling dissatisfied with something in your life, ask yourself if it’s based on your life really is missing something or because you’re comparing it to something you’ve seen, read, or heard. My guess is that if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll quickly realize that you already have everything you need.

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Seller or Teller

Build upon strengths, and weaknesses will gradually take care of themselves. Joyce C Lock

Are you a seller or teller?

If you’re not sure, then let me clarify for you.

A person that is a seller is one that decides to take their fate into their own hands. It’s a person that regularly chooses to live on a knifes edge between failure and success. It’s the person that moves forward despite being afraid of doing so. Sellers are willing to accept uncertainty, and in some cases, even enjoy it. Sellers are proactive.

A teller is one that waits and prefers to act when asked to do so. Picture for a moment a bank teller. They’re usually waiting at the counter for a customer to walk up and submit a request, which they then fulfill. Tellers enjoy structure and stability. Tellers are reactive.

There is nothing inherently bad or wrong with being a seller or a teller since the world needs both personalities. And of course, there can be times in your life when depending on your circumstances; you might have to adopt a role that doesn’t suit you well. But always keep in mind that you don’t have to stay stuck in that role forever.

So, as you go through life and get to know yourself better, figure out if you’re a seller or teller. The sooner you do and come to terms with who you are, the sooner you’ll be able to play to your strengths.

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Plan and Act

Take action! An inch of movement will bring you closer to your goals than a mile of intention. Steve Maraboli,

What’s your plan of action?

Maybe a better question would be after you plan, when will you act?

What will you do next?

It’s great to dream and think about what you want out of life, but there comes the point when sitting and thinking will only become more frustrating unless you begin to act.

Let me be clear, I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t plan or think about what you need or want to do, and planning is a great mental exercise, but very little is learned from planning. Action provides results.

But what if you don’t get the results you’re looking for?

Then revisit your plans and course correct.

If you hadn’t acted, you would have never known that your plans were incorrect.

It’s easy to get stuck in and hide in the dreaming and planning of life because it’s safe to do so. Very little is at risk when all you’re doing is planning. But action brings fear—both fear of failure and, in some cases, even fear of getting what you want.

Why the fear of getting what you want?

That’s a topic I’ll address in a separate blog post.

Acting doesn’t have to be in the form of big, bold steps that throw your life out of balance unless, of course, you’re looking to really shake things up. Small, experimental baby steps are often enough to give you a taste, an idea of what your life might look like if you continue down that path.

So, the next time you find yourself thinking, or making plans about what you want out of life, act as soon as possible. You’ll find that there’s something magical about acting that can’t be experienced or understood unless you’re engaged in it.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, please share it with one person you love.

Question Your Thoughts

Don't believe everything you think. Thoughts are just that - thoughts. Allan Lokos

What are you thinking about?

Stop for a moment or two and just listen to your inner voice.

What’s it saying?

If you listen long enough, you’ll soon realize that so much of what you consider to be your thoughts are just randomly generated by your mind. It’s almost as though you’re a spectator listening in on a one-sided conversation.

This spectating or witnessing your mind at work is a crucial observation because it highlights the fact that you don’t control most of your thoughts.

You see, right now, your mind is running through endless scenarios of predictions and what-ifs, none, or very few that are real. It’s basing its judgments and ideas on a combination of past experiences and predicting what might happen in the future. And it delivers these judgments to you in the form of thoughts.

What does this mean for you?

It means you shouldn’t believe everything you think. And not believing everything you think can be liberating.

Not being bound by fictional thoughts allows you to take a more intentional approach to life. And although you can’t apply this intentionality all the time because it would be exhausting, you can use it to override some of the false thoughts your mind is feeding you.

By the way, spectating or pay attention to your thoughts is a form of meditation. But if you’re allergic to the M-word, then you can call it whatever you want.

So, go back to listening to your thoughts and pay attention to what they’re saying. Ask yourself honestly, just how much of what you’re thinking is real versus being made up by your mind. And then you make the decision, whether you want to be controlled and act on thoughts that may or may not be true. Or break free from the stories your mind is feeding you and take a more deliberate approach to life.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, please share it with one person you love.