Raj Daniels

What’s one of the easiest ways to lift your mood?

I’ll give you a clue, it has nothing to do with you.

If you guessed helping or performing a good deed for someone else, then you’re correct.

While performing a good deed for another person is not a solution for all your life’s problems, it can change your mood almost immediately.

But how does helping someone else help you?

That’s a good question.

There are several reasons that helping others lifts your own mood. Here are a few that might help you do so.

The first is that it shifts your attention from the issues you might be facing to assistance you’re providing the other person. You temporarily forget about your own challenges.

The second is that you feel more connected to the broader community. Even if you’re the loner or introverted type, it’s natural for you to desire a sense of connection, and helping others fulfills that innate longing for connection.

And last is reciprocation. In his book Influence, author Robert Cialdini writes about reciprocation as one of the pillars of influencing others. Not influencing them in a manipulating manner but enrolling them as part of your tribe. Think of reciprocity as give and take. I’m not suggesting that you only do so that you can receive, but collaboration and helping each other is, in the long run, beneficial for all of us.

So, the next time you find yourself having a bad day or in the doldrums, see if you can motivate yourself to shift your focus, even temporarily, away from yourself and towards the service of someone else. You might find that while helping others doesn’t change or eliminate your own challenges, a slight lifting of your mood can help you better deal with the problems you’re facing.

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When was the last time you played a zero-sum game?

Do you think of life as a zero-sum game?

If you’re not sure what zero-sum is, then let me help you. Zero-sum is a situation or game where again by one is offset by an equal loss by another.

Most games, especially in the world of sports, are zero-sum games defined by a clear winner and loser. And of course, board games and alike are also designed with zero-sum in mind.

When it comes to games, zero-sum thinking is fine since most games are played for fun, but if you go through life with a zero-sum perspective, then you’re working from a position of scarcity. You’re watching other people succeed and feeling that it’s at your expense. They win, and you lose.

Is it true that when others win or succeed you lose?

There might be times when you feel that it’s true. For example, if you’re in the final selection for a team or a job and another candidate is given the position, you might feel that their win is your loss. And while there’s real pain associated with your loss, losing that one opportunity doesn’t mean that all the opportunities are gone. It’s just that one.

Shifting or moving away from zero-sum-based thinking requires you to change your belief from scarcity-minded to one of abundant thinking. This can be difficult, especially if you’ve been taught to believe that another person’s gain is your loss. But it is possible and beneficial for your mental wellbeing to change your perspective.

Moving from a scarcity mindset to an abundant one moves you from being competitive to collaborative, which, over time, is better for you and those around you.

So, the next time you find yourself thinking that someone else’s gain is your loss, remind yourself that life is not a zero-sum game and that opportunities are abundant for you to succeed too. You might be surprised how many more opportunities you’ll begin to see once you open yourself up to looking for them.

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Who told you?

Who taught you?

Where did you learn that?

Where do your beliefs come from?

Are your beliefs outdated and holding you back?

Until very recently, it was thought that certain races were less capable than others, and these beliefs were perpetuated through generations. Unfortunately, some people still believe this to be true.

Women were also thought to be less capable than men, and again, some still believe this to be true.

Racial and gender-based beliefs are just a couple of examples of beliefs that are alive and well in certain segments of our population, and the reason they are alive and well is because people don’t stop to question what they were taught.

Freeing yourself from beliefs that hold you back requires you to commit to unlearning what you’ve been taught. It requires you to question those that you consider to be the authority in your life. And this kind of questioning can be destabilizing because it goes to the core of who you are. But it can also be liberating.

Asking or performing an internal investigation into your belief system is not easy, but it is important to develop a more authentic self. It’s also important if you want to rid yourself of generational baggage.

You see, the people that you learned from may not have questioned their belief system, so you might be stuck with beliefs that are generations old, and while there might be a few beliefs that stand the test of time, there are sure to be others that have lost their validity a long time ago.

Unlearning or releasing beliefs that prevent you from changing your life is no easy task but is almost a requirement if you want to experience real change in your life. You must leave behind the old, no longer useful parts of you to make room for your new beliefs.

So, the next time you find yourself wanting to do something different in your life but stuck with the belief that tells you that you can’t, or that’s not what you’re supposed to do, stop and ask yourself why. Who told you, or where did you learn that belief? See if you can root out and free yourself from the trap of your old belief and step into a new, more authentic you.

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What would you do if you had all the time in the world?

Think about it for a moment.

Would you travel?

Would you pursue new hobbies?

Would spend more time with friends or loved ones?

What would you do?

While dreaming about having all the time in the world is a great exercise, reality soon sets in, and you realize that you don’t.

But you do have some time.

You have gaps, spaces in your schedule that you can take advantage of to fulfill a few of your ‘all the time in the world’ desires.

Using the gaps or downtime in your schedule wisely requires a level of intentionality and planning because if you don’t plan, your spare time will quickly get sucked away by distractions and other less fulfilling chores.

Speaking of chores. I understand that cleaning, laundry, and other domestic activities are a requirement of life. Still, if you choose, you can begin to batch them or, if you have the resources, outsource them, allowing you to free up your time to pursue more fulfilling activities. Unless, of course, you’re the kind of person that finds fulfillment in domestic chores, in which case, more power to you.

So, the next time you find yourself with the desire to pursue an activity or project that you think might provide you more personal fulfillment, start by looking for gaps in your schedule. And then quickly block those gaps ahead of time and use them to your advantage. If you don’t learn to do this, not only will you not have all the time in the world, but you’ll also lose the little time you already have.

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How good are you at managing your environment?

Why would you want to manage your environment?

The primary reason you want to manage your environment is to help you reach your goals. Or said another way, allow you to live the life you want to live.

Let’s look at a few concrete examples of managing your environment.

If you feel that you’re overly distracted by social media and it’s affecting your relationships or preventing you from focusing on a task you want to accomplish, removing apps from your devices or making them harder to access are a couple of ways of managing your environment.

If it’s health and fitness you’re after, then removing junk food from your pantry or pre-committing to workouts are ways to manage your environment.

If time off from work or vacations are a priority for you, then booking in advance or blocking your calendar ahead of time are a couple of ways that can help you achieve your goals.

Managing your environment is all about eliminating decision-making. Or said differently, making decisions ahead of time so that when you’re tired or faced with choices or temptations that move you away from your goal, the ‘good’ or ‘rational’ version of you has already made the choices for the current you.

Managing your environment for your personal success or goals is all about setting rules that help you manipulate your future self.

So, the next time your find yourself contemplating a change that you’d like to make in your life, instead of relying on willpower, which can wax, and wane based on your energy and mood, consider managing your environment. Give your future you a head start by eliminating decisions and defining a clearer path towards your goals.

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How good are you at mind reading?

If you’re not sure then let me help you.

You’re not very good.

Not to worry, you’re not alone.

While you might be able to recognize patterns in people’s behavior and, in some cases, even be able to guess their actions correctly, it’s not because you can read their minds.

Even though you’re not a mind reader, how often do you find yourself acting as if you know what a person will say or do?

This kind of anticipatory thinking can lead to all kinds of problems because you begin to prepare yourself for what you think a person is going to say or do before they act. Or, perhaps said another way, they are guilty before they’ve acted.

Letting a person’s actions or words unfold before reacting is difficult because your brain is a very efficient pattern recognizing machine. And so, to save energy, it looks for cues and begins to formulate responses even before events have occurred. And this is where mind-reading can cause problems.

So how do you stop mind reading?

Well, you can’t really stop, but you can override your first set of thoughts. You can give a person room to act and speak, knowing that you don’t need to respond right away. You can give yourself time to digest their actions and words and respond later, or not at all.

So, the next time you find yourself jumping to a conclusion about what you think a person is going to say or do, remind yourself that you’re not a mind reader. Give them the benefit of the doubt and let the moment play out. If you begin to give people room to say and act without pre-judging them, then they might do the same for you too.

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What will be your greatest challenge in life?

Before I tell you what it is, I want you to think about what’s your biggest challenge right now.

Okay, are you ready?

Your greatest challenge in life will be your inability to accept things the way they are. Or said differently, things, people, and situations are not how you want them to be.

That’s it.

This incongruency between how things are and how you would like them to be can apply to all areas of your life. Think about the broad four pillars that your life is built on. Your career/finances, physical health, relationships, and mental/spiritual wellbeing. These are the areas where you’ll face your biggest challenges.

So how should you handle the challenge of misalignment or incongruency that you will inevitably experience during your lifetime?

One solution is to approach life with radical acceptance. Psychologist Tara Brach coined the term radical acceptance, and it essentially means accepting life on life’s terms and not resisting what you cannot change. It’s about saying yes to life as it is.

While this might sound like a passive approach to life, it’s not. It’s actually a very active, intentional approach because it requires you to understand and acknowledge the difference between what you can and cannot control. And then apply your energy appropriately towards only that which you can control.

Radical acceptance is a skill that takes time to cultivate. But not to worry, life will provide you with plenty of opportunities to practice and improve your skill. Your most significant impediment to learning radical acceptance will be your own personal resistance to doing so.

So, the next time you find yourself in a situation that you wish were different, try using radical acceptance. While it’s not a panacea for all of life’s problems, it’s an opportunity for you to ground yourself before you decide if you really need to act or radically accept life the way it is.

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How do you combat inertia?

If you don’t think you struggle with inertia, then let me provide you with a definition and see if it sounds familiar. Inertia is a tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged.

Now perhaps it sounds familiar.

So how do you overcome inertia?

Well, first, you must admit that you’re struggling with it. And then you must do the work to find the reasons for your inertia.

But admit to who and why should you admit to being stuck?

As they say, in the world of addiction recovery, admitting you’re stuck is the first and most difficult step. Without this step, there is no cure or solution.

You don’t have to publicly declare that you’re stuck, but if you’re seeking to make a change in your life, then it requires you to be honest with at least yourself. You are very capable of having a difficult, straight-talking conversation with yourself if you permit yourself to do so.

Once you’ve spent some time introspecting and being honest with yourself, then, and if you really want to change, you must lay out the steps or create a plan to overcome the inertia.

Are plans and steps necessary?

Yes, they are.

Think of plans and steps as guardrails that prevent you from slipping back into the grasp of inertia. Keep in mind that when you’re battling inertia, you’re up against Newton’s first law of motion, that an object at rest will remain at rest.

Once you’ve identified the steps to change, then you must begin to act. At first, even the most imperceptible actions are helpful because they are the foundation for momentum, and once you have momentum on your side, you’re almost unstoppable.

So, the next time you find yourself battling inertia and not making the changes you wish to see in your life, take some time to examine the reasons that are holding you back. Once you’ve identified what they are, and if you think you still want to make a change in your life, then make a plan and begin to act. Leave inertia behind and change your life.

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How often do you dismiss or ignore an idea or opportunity because you think it won’t work for you?

Without even trying, you fall into the traps of, that won’t work for me, or I could never do that.

I agree that if you’ve tried the method a few times before and haven’t seen results, then dismiss it and move on. But not attempting before trying speaks volumes about you.

When you find yourself resisting opportunities to try something different, it’s because you’ve begun to believe that you can’t change and that your identity is fixed. And while there might be some truth to how you’re feeling, almost everyone can change if they really want to.

You’ve seen or heard the stories plenty of times.

Man quits smoking after thirty years.

Woman in her sixties graduates from college.

Man loses fifty pounds after heart attack.

And many more.

When you hear the stories of people that made what seems to be drastic changes in their lives, it’s because they decided to do something radically different. They no longer self-sabotaged themselves by thinking it couldn’t work for them, and so they tried.

I’m not suggesting or recommending you jump at or try every new idea or opportunity you’re presented with, but don’t count them out because you think they won’t work for you. Evaluate them for their merit and validity and if they’re sound, then at least try.

So, the next time you find yourself self-sabotaging with thoughts of, it won’t work for me, or I could never do that, stop, and re-evaluate. Step out of your fixed view of yourself and try something new. You never know. It might just end up working for you.

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How often do you find yourself getting angry or upset about the same things?

For you, the culprits might be traffic, the weather, or some other irritation. But the one almost everyone has in common is other people.

How many of these things do you think you can change?

Rationally speaking, you know that traffic and weather are out of your control. You can prepare for traffic by leaving more time for a commute and as for the weather. Nowadays, there’s a technology that can provide you with a ten-day forecast, hopefully giving you enough time to adjust your plans accordingly.

But what about other people?

What can you do to control or prepare for them?

If you’ve been around people long enough, then you know that there’s very little you can do to control them. Unless, of course, you’ve learned the art of hypnosis. If not, then you’re like the rest of us, which means that the only person you can control is yourself.

The key to self-control is the ability to change your perspective. It’s the ability to view people and situations through a different lens. You see, when you find yourself getting aggravated over the same things repeatedly, then you’ve fallen into a pattern of behavior. The good news is that you can undo the pattern. The bad news is that you must want to and rarely is it easy to do so.

But if you don’t change then, as the wise ones have succinctly said, insanity is inflexibly doing the same thing over and over while hoping for different results.

Now I’m not going to say that your insane, but if you’re constantly angry, aggravated, or upset over the actions of others, then, well, let me say that it might be time for some self-reflection.

The fact is that you understand that the common denominator underlying all your emotions is you: no one or nothing else. While external factors do exist, all they are is the stimulus. How you respond is ultimately up to you.

So, when you find yourself being repeatedly affected negatively by an event or person, instead of focusing on what’s going on externally, turn inward. When possible, extract yourself from the situation. But if that’s not possible, then to prove that you’re not insane, learn to change your perspective.

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Why is it easier to say, than do?

Because as they say, talk is cheap. There’s little friction involved in talking.

While there’s truth to the phrase, easier said than done, just talking will not get you anywhere. You must learn to do.

But doing is difficult.

Doing requires commitment.

Doing requires belief and in some cases, suspending disbelief.

Doing requires you to overcome fear.

Doing requires you to risk failing.

Doing requires you to act.

Doing requires so much more than talking, and that’s why more people talk than do.

But doing does begin with talking. It begins with the words you say to the world or the self-talk in your mind.

Now I’ll grant you some leeway in that maybe you won’t do everything you say you’ll do because, after all, you are allowed to change your mind. But beware, it’s a slippery slope between the person that only says versus the person that does.

So, the next time you find yourself thinking, yes, thinking, because thinking is talking in your mind about something you want to do, you’ll need to decide whether you’re a talker or a doer. And know that while it is easier said than done, the only way to progress, to change, to grow, is by doing.

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When will you make your move?

When will you take your turn?

When you feel compelled to do something different with your life, what will you do?

Granted that right now, you might not be in a position to make a sudden or drastic change to your life without causing too much discomfort to yourself or those around you, but don’t let that stop you from making a small move.

Sometimes the smallest, imperceptible moves can be all you need to set you off in a new direction.

Yes, I agree that your current set of circumstances constrains you, and the limitations you feel holding you in place are real. But they’re also malleable.

How do I know this?

Because your current circumstances are not permanent, you weren’t born into them. They developed over time. And this means that you can make moves to dismantle them.

To dismantle your current constraints, you must start by recognizing and identifying the reasons you used to get you in the position you are right now. This is not about blaming yourself; it’s about understanding yourself. It’s about self-compassion and forgiveness.

Once you can identify the strategies you used to create your current situation, you can begin to replace them with a new, different approach to get you out.

Creating change in your life takes courage and is not easy, both for you and those around you. And that’s why I recommend using baby steps to do so. There will be times when small steps will not work, and you’ll have to take drastic measures, and when that happens, you’ll have to hold on tight to survive the repercussions.

So, the next time you feel compelled to do something different with your life, make your move. When possible, test the waters with small steps, or when it’s safe to do so, plunge right in. In this game of life, time is your opponent, and it never stops taking its turn. And while you can’t stop time, if you want to live a life that’s meaningful to you, you’ll have to learn to step up and take your turn.

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What are you doing to improve your psychological well-being?

Before reading any further, let’s look at the definition of psychological well-being.

Psychological well-being (PWB) is defined as one’s level of psychological happiness/health, encompassing life satisfaction and feelings of accomplishment.

In a nutshell, there’s happiness, satisfaction, and feelings of accomplishment.

So how do you work on all these areas?

Fear not. I’m going to provide you with a quick ‘how to improve your well-being’ framework. Oh, and this framework is not my idea. I’m just the messenger. The framework is based on scientific research. You can read the entire study here.

The four pillars of the framework are awareness, connection, insight, and purpose.

Awareness is about paying attention to your environment and your internal cues, such as bodily sensations, thoughts, and emotions.

Connection is as it sounds. It’s about improving and maintaining relationships with other people. Think community.

Insight is about introspection. It’s recognizing your thinking about situations and what triggers you and then changing or adjusting your thinking to improve your well-being.

Purpose is about finding purpose in life. This pillar is perhaps the most challenging because your purpose in life is bound to change. But if you can link your daily activities to a purpose beyond immediate results, then you will live a more fulfilled life.

It’s obvious that each one of these pillars requires time, attention, and action to improve your psychological well-being. But a little effort applied regularly will go a long way.

So, you have a choice to make. Now that you have a framework to guide you, will you ignore it and let your well-being stumble through life, or will you choose to prioritize your psychological health? I hope you believe you’re worth the effort and choose the latter.

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What’s your number one rule?

Or, perhaps said differently, what’s your number one value?

For example, most medical school graduates commit to an oath of ‘do no harm.’ Essentially promising to use their judgment to do what’s best for their patients.

I understand that physicians commit to this oath in a professional capacity, but what if you had to commit to your own personal oath? An oath, value, or rule that you had to always abide by.

What would be your oath?

Now I get that life is complicated, and it might be difficult or, in some cases, almost impossible to abide by or commit to one rule or oath, but what if you could get close? What if it was your fallback position?

Let’s use the example of a quote by Dalai Lama. He says, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

Is it always possible?

I don’t know. I guess it depends on how self-actualized you are or your level of self-control. But even if it’s not always possible, how would life look if it were mostly possible?

Being kind is just one example of a personal commitment or oath. But there are many you could choose from. You could commit to telling no lies, always be helpful, or you could even choose to do no harm.

Committing to an oath or rule will not make you a perfect human being. No one is perfect, and even the Dalai Lama has been known to get angry occasionally. No, committing to a rule is about bringing you back; it’s about centering and reminding yourself of the person you want to be.

So, put some thought into the kind of person you want to be and commit to your own personal oath. Do this so when life or people begin to test you, and you’re not sure how to respond, you can always fall back on your number one rule.

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What will you do with your imagination today?

Your imagination is one of the most beautiful and powerful faculties you have. Your imagination can transport you to worlds of your choosing. It can create endless amounts of beauty, but it can also cause you pain and suffering.

Actively using your imagination to create, build, and envision a beautiful future is something you can do right now sitting where you are.

But imagination is also a double-edged sword.

You can also use your imagination to think about problems that don’t yet exist or wonder what people may or may not be saying about you. Essentially using your own imagination to torture yourself emotionally.

Almost everything you see around you in the built environment was once a part of a person’s imagination. They saw it in their mind’s eye and brought it to life. And if you believe in a higher power, you could even go so far as to say that even the natural world is the product of that power’s imagination.

Your imagination is an infinite power and is only limited by the boundaries you define. And only you can choose to stifle it or let it run wild. It’s your own personal superpower.

So, harness the power of your imagination today, and instead of letting it drift towards disempowering thoughts, drive it towards beautiful and creative ideas. Use your superpower to create a world in your mind in which one day you might reside.

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How do you manage your personal energy?

You have a finite amount of physical and mental energy, and each day you must decide how you’ll use it.

While you might not deplete the entire amount of energy you have on a daily basis, there are times during the day when you’ll feel as though you have more energy than at other times.

The majority of people have the most energy after a good night of sleep since the body and brain have the opportunity to rest and recover. However, there are some individuals that do function better in the latter half of the day.

It’s important to recognize that managing your energy is more important than how you manage your time. What’s the use of having time to perform a task if you don’t have the energy to do so? And if you force yourself to perform in a low energy state, it might take you twice as long, or more, to perform the same task, so then your time management goes out the window.

Learning your own personal energy cycles takes some time but pays off handsomely in the long run. You see, since you can’t control time, knowing how or when to make the best use of the time is more beneficial. Essentially aligning your prime energy cycles with the time you have will give you the best results.

Now I know that you will not always be able to align your personal energy cycles with what’s going in your life because of external obligations and other events beyond your control. But that shouldn’t prevent you from learning your peak energy cycles to know how to use them best when you have access to time.

So, take some time to learn your energy cycles. And then use your energy to create, to produce, and to grow. Manage your energy to make the most of time and ultimately the life you have.

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When will you give yourself permission to change?

If you’re seeking change in your life, then there will come the point when you have to give yourself permission to do so.

Why do you need permission to change?

Because when you attempt to change any part of your life, you’re leaving a previous version of you behind. And this can be unsettling if not daunting.

You see, you are very attached to who you are. After all, the person you currently are has helped you navigate life up to this point, and since you’re still alive, it’s done so with a degree of success. But now you want some aspects of your life to be different, and to do so; you’ll need to leave behind or refuse to identify with parts of the old you.

The problem with trying to leave or change parts of your life is that their gravitational pull is powerful. Since they’ve been with you for so long, they’re continuously working to pull you back to them. And these are the parts of you that you need to ask permission to change.

Asking for permission to change begins with acknowledging and being grateful for the parts of your life that you want to leave behind. After all, they served you well by keeping you alive. But now you want something different, and you must give yourself permission to move on.

Giving yourself permission to change will help eliminate your internal conflict between the person you are and the person you want to be.

So, if you’re seeking to change parts of your life, then give yourself permission to do so. Become the person you want to be, but start by thanking the person you are, the one that got you to the place you are today.

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How often do you ask yourself; how do I get there?

Or, what’s my next step?

If you’re not asking yourself some version of these questions regularly, then it might indicate that you’re going through life without any specific direction in mind. And while having direction is not a requirement of life, it does make it more interesting.

Not having direction in your life might also mean that you’re lost, which is fine if that’s how you want to go through life, but if it’s not, then now might be a good time to stop and ask for directions.

But who would you ask?

Well, before you ask, you need to know where you’re going.

As Lewis Carrol wrote in the exchange between Alice and the Cheshire Cat in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland:

“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”

“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the Cat.

“I don’t much care where—” said Alice.

“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the Cat.

“—so long as I get SOMEWHERE,” Alice added as an explanation.

“Oh, you’re sure to do that,” said the Cat, “if you only walk long enough.”

Somewhere is the place you’ll end up if you don’t begin to get specific about your destinations in life. And yes, I used the plural of destination because you might have different goals for the various stages of your life.

Once you’ve decided on a destination, then you can begin to map out your journey. You can also begin to ask others for help, and who knows, you might even enlist a few fellow travelers that will support you on your way.

So, spend some time thinking about where you want your life to go and start asking yourself, how do I get there? The more frequently you ask, the more answers you’ll get. And think of each answer as a stepping stone that will lead you closer to the destination you’re seeking.

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When was the last time you had a new experience?

If you’re like many adults, then you’re probably caught up in the humdrum routine of everyday life. And while routines can be helpful, they can eventually lead to a numbness towards life.

Why should you explore new experiences?

Well, there are a few reasons.

New experiences stimulate your brain, and they almost force your brain to grow and to adapt to the experience’s novelty. A new experience can also change your perspective on life and stimulate new ideas.

Researchers have tied the desire to have new experiences as a predictor of longevity. The term they’ve coined for this behavior is neophilia.

How you feel about the idea of a new experience depends on your personality. If you’re risk-averse or shy, then maybe the idea of experiencing something new isn’t as appealing to you. And I understand, and for you, I recommend baby steps. If you’re the gregarious, living life to the extreme kind of person, then this blog post is probably irrelevant for you.

Injecting your life with new experiences doesn’t need to be overly time-consuming or break your budget, but it does require deliberate action. You must seek them out because they rarely show up in your life.

So, open your calendar today and schedule in time for a new experience. It could be something as extravagant as a trip to a place you’ve never been before or something as simple as trying new cuisine. Think of new experiences as opportunities and then leverage them to lead a fuller, more exciting life.

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How does language shape your experience?

The language you use to define your experiences is and will be how you remember your experience, and you create expectations based on your previous experiences.

While you navigate your surroundings physically, it’s the language or, more specifically, the words you use that define your interactions. This also applies to your interactions with the people you interact with.

The words that come out of your mouth, or even more important, the words you say to yourself shape not only your current reality but also your future expectations. And the constant narration in your head directly influences how you feel about yourself and other people.

The language you use literally shapes your thinking. How you describe people, places and situations will be how you experience them.

Think about this for a moment. Your brain exists in a dark box, and while your senses feed it information, your brain can only understand the sensations once they are interpreted via language.

So why am I harping on about language and experiences?

Good question.

Because, if you believe or if I’ve managed to convince you that language is what shapes your experience, then you now have the power to shape your experiences.

When you find yourself in situations, whether you’re interacting with the physical world or with people, you have the ability, through the language you use, to change your perception of the situation.

Now I’m not suggesting you ever jeopardize your well-being by ignoring potentially harmful threats, but as long as you’re in a relatively safe and secure environment, you can tweak your perception of reality on command.

So, the next time you find yourself narrating an experience with a person or situation, think about the language you’re using. And realize that you have the power to change how you experience and ultimately feel about the situation and or the person by changing the language you use to describe it.

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