What are your talents?

Is there a particular skill or subject that you excel at?

No need to be modest here.

Everyone has something they know or have been told that they’re good at or have been formally qualified to do.

Here’s a short list of some of the more common skills.

Art             

Craftwork

Cooking

Engineering

Financial

Math

Medicine

Public Speaking

Strategy

Writing

And there are many more.

What if you made time to share your skills or talents?

What if you committed to spending just a tiny amount of your time sharing or teaching what you know to someone who wants to learn?

Your skills and talents are gifts that you can pass on and still keep. They can never be taken from you, yet you can enrich another person’s life by sharing them.

Consider sharing your talents and giving them away to improve another person’s life. Who knows, the next time you need to learn something, someone might do the same for you too.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

How much emotional interest do you charge?

When someone slights or wrongs you, how long do they have to continue paying for their original transgression?

Do you continue to remind them?

Do you make sure they never forget?

How about you?

How much emotional interest do you pay?

When you experience a negative emotional event in your life, how long do you continue carrying it with you, essentially paying for it over and over again?

If you’re like the majority of people, you probably only have an emotional interest in negative events and very quickly forget positive events.

Rarely do you see someone happy and smiling about a great event that happened to them a week ago, but traces of a negative event tend to linger in their psyche for much longer.

Albert Einstein once said, “Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world.” And this is because it allows the interest on money to earn interest, growing on itself like a snowball.

Emotions will do the same if you let them.

The longer you decide to carry an emotion about an event the stronger it will grow, basically compounding interest on top of your original emotion.

So your choices are: How much emotional interest do you want to charge others, and perhaps even more importantly, how much emotional interest do you want to pay?

Be careful and choose wisely. Overcharging interest to others or overpaying yourself might lead to emotional bankruptcy.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

When was the last time you experienced a total, uninterrupted moment with another person?

Where, just for a moment, the other person was all that you could hear and see?

Where, just for a moment, all your attention was focused on them?

Where, just for a moment, they were the most important person in the world?

John Steinbeck wrote, “Try to understand men, if you understand each other you will be kind to each other. Knowing a man well never leads to hate and nearly always leads to love.”

Ponder that for a moment.

Now, imagine what the world would look like if we all practiced understanding first.

Stephen Covey captured a similar sentiment when he wrote, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

But seeking to understand takes intent. It takes time.

And not shallow time, flitting between disengaged and engaged.

It requires big, full moments of time without distractions.

The next time you have the good fortune of engaging with another person, give them your full attention, even if it’s for just a short amount of time.

And yes, I say good fortune because having the opportunity to spend time with someone should not be taken for granted. In fact, many lonely individuals crave attention and interaction with other humans.

So, put Steinbeck’s and Covey’s words into practice and experience the richness that an uninterrupted, fully engaged moment with another person can provide for them and for you.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

What would your life be like if you had someone to solve all of your problems?

If you had your own personal problem butler that appeared every time you had a problem and said, “Here, let me take that for you?”

Do you believe such a person would make your life better or easier?

Would you really give all of your problems to someone else to solve?

Or would you keep some for yourself?

Imagine how plain your life would be if you had absolutely no problems and if every day sailed along smoothly without as many hiccups for you to overcome.

Very soon, boredom would set in.

It’s probably not the case that you don’t want any problems; more than likely, you wish you could pick and choose from a problem buffet. And you’d pick the ones you think you could solve and leave the rest for others.

But then life becomes predictable.

And again, boredom would set in.

Problems are a strange phenomenon because so many aspects of a problem boil down to perspective. Have you ever noticed how you can see how others should solve their problems but struggle with your own? It’s because you have an outside view of their problem.

Now you can do the same for yourself, with your own personal problem butler.

Well, not quite, but close.

Writing your problems out on paper can give you an opportunity to approach them from different perspectives. An additional benefit is that you can get them out of your head, at least temporarily.

Once they are on paper, you can break them down into smaller, more manageable pieces and give each one the required focus.

Removing your problems from your mind can help you with any anxiety or overwhelm you might be experiencing. In fact, journaling has been recommended by therapists for this very reason.

So, although you may never have your own personal problem, butler, there’s a sheet of paper somewhere close to you saying, “Here, let me take those for you.”

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

What is Bernoulli’s Principle?

If you know, then pat yourself on your back because only a few people can remember the lesson from their high school science classes.

Bernoulli’s Principle states that “For any airfoil generating lift, there must be a pressure imbalance, i.e. lower average air pressure on the top than on the bottom. Bernoulli’s principle states that this pressure difference must be accompanied by a speed difference.”

Isn’t that amazing?

Just kidding!

Let me simplify.

Air must pass over the top of an airplane’s airfoil or wing faster than the bottom of the wing to create lift and keep it afloat.

That’s right. Air!

The job of a propeller or jet engine is to move the aircraft forward in such a way that the Bernoulli Principle can work. But it’s all based on air.

When was the last time you saw air?

You know it’s all around you because, hopefully, you’re breathing it right now.

So here we are as a collective species basing our entire existence on something we take for granted yet cannot hear, see, or touch unless under certain controlled circumstances.

That’s a lot of faith.

What if you could use that same faith to propel yourself forward through life, knowing that certain principles are working for you, too?

What if there’s also a version of the Bernoulli Principle for humans?

It might exist, but you won’t find it unless you have faith, and not necessarily faith in a religious context, although that might and does work for some people. But faith that there are indeed other forces beyond your capacity to understand that are just waiting to be activated by you.

So, the next time you see an airplane, remember that its entire premise is based on the invisible and visible working together—and this applies to your life, too.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

What is the only thing you can really control?

It’s not people.

It’s not outcomes.

And most of the time, it’s not even yourself.

The only thing you can control if you pay attention, is your thought for a moment. I was tempted to say thoughts but realized that thoughts are like an infinite chain of falling dominoes where one leads to another and another until they are consciously interrupted.

If you pay attention, your extent of control is to the thought you’re having right now as you read this. And, in this split second, you must decide how you’ll react to it because if you don’t, your brain will go into auto-pilot and find a new or previous thought to fill the gap so you don’t have to expend any additional energy.

Your brain is an expert at filling thoughts and creating thought patterns for you because it saves you time and energy, and your brain loves conserving energy.

Stop reading for a moment. Ask yourself what thoughts are you having right now.

I’ll wait.

.

.

.

Were you able to stop reading and focus on your thoughts?

If you did, then you experienced control for a moment.

The interesting thing about being able to control your thoughts for a few moments is that it helps you re-write old thinking patterns, which can ultimately change the direction of your life.

So, if you find yourself struggling to change a behavior or habit or if you think you’d like to change how you react to certain situations, then begin to practice taking control of your thoughts, even if it’s just for a moment.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

Who’s going to be the lucky winner today?

Who will be the one person you’re going to shower with kindness and affection today?

Who will be the one person you will make feel extra special today?

Who’s going to be the one lucky person in your life today?

Will it be a co-worker, family member, friend, or complete stranger?

It’s okay if you don’t know yet. You still have time to choose someone. But when you do, don’t tell them. Just be super nice to them.

If they know you and are surprised by your affection and kindness, then I guess you’ve learned something about your relationship with them.

If they’re a stranger, they’ll think you’re like this all the time, and maybe you’ll increase their faith in humanity.

I know you’re busy and, like most people, have a lot going on, but taking a few moments out of your day to make another person feel special can go a long way for them and you.

You never know when one act of kindness could change the trajectory of another person’s life.

So pick a winner you’re going to make feel special today, and who knows, someone might be choosing you to be the lucky winner of their affection and kindness, too.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

Do you believe it’s your duty or responsibility to make someone else happy?

If you don’t, you might be labeled as a sociopath or someone with a lack of conscience. However, you’ll also experience a sense of freedom that most people will never know. This freedom allows you to live your life on your terms, unburdened by the weight of others’ emotions.

However, if you do believe it’s your responsibility, then you’re going to have to tread a very slippery slope. You’ll know when you start down this slope because if you pay attention, you’ll begin to notice their moods changing, sometimes erratically, in accordance with your behavior.

Taking responsibility for another person’s happiness can be a huge burden because, eventually, your life will be driven by how they feel and not by what you want.

This is not to say that you should start indulging in sociopathic behavior, but you should not position yourself as the single provider of a person’s happiness.

This principle applies to you as well. By being self-aware and understanding your own emotional needs, you can avoid the trap of relying on others for your happiness.

If you rely on someone else to make you feel happy, you are burdening them and abdicating responsibility for your own feelings. You are also leaving yourself vulnerable to their behavior and whims.

Managing or mastering one’s emotional state is a difficult task in itself and can take a lifetime of effort and practice. Ultimately, you’ll learn that only you can really make yourself happy, and you can only hope that others will learn that lesson for themselves, too.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

Would you like to hear people say these things about you?

You’re caring.

You’re capable

You’re confident.

You’re kind.

You’re lovable.

You’re smart.

You’re thoughtful.

Do you think these things about yourself?

Scratch that.

Do you believe these things about yourself?

You see, how you view yourself will be amplified and then communicated within every interaction you have. Your view of yourself will show up in your actions, body language, and words when speaking to people.

Focusing on behaving and building the character traits you want to be known for is much easier than convincing others, and once you begin to act in alignment with how you feel about yourself, others will also start to see you that way.

Your thoughts about yourself are your keys to how others perceive you and what they’ll say about you. And although your identity shouldn’t depend on what people say and think about you, navigating socially is easier when people view you positively.

So begin to believe in yourself and what you want others to believe about you, and you’ll find that over time, people will indeed see you and how you think of yourself.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

Are you familiar with the questions, for what, and for whom?

In business, it’s a common way to describe what your product or service is used for and who your customer or user will be.

You can also use the same questions as a useful tool in life outside of business.

When you look at your daily activities, you can ask yourself what you are doing them for and for whom.

It’s an excellent way to track why you do what you do.

In business, if you can’t continue to answer these questions, you eventually go out of business because you lose sight of the bigger picture.

In life, if you don’t have an answer to these questions, then you might begin to feel out of control and perhaps even a little lost.

You can almost consider these questions to be a personal compass that you can use to guide you through life. They can also provide you with some balance because if you find that everything is you do is only for you, then you have the opportunity to course correct if you choose to.

Take some time to think through and answer the questions for what and for whom. Because the more time you spend not knowing for what and for whom, the less time you’ll have to make course corrections and get your life back on track.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, don’t keep it secret – share it with one person you love.

How do you respond when you’re asked, ‘How are you?’

Great.

Good.

Okay.

Or

Not so good.

Struggling.

Having a hard day.

Current culture tends to reward positive responses, and the media has shaped people’s minds to think that you should always be happy and feel great, and if you’re not, then something must be wrong with you.

So, how are you supposed to respond when you’re not having a good day?

It can be challenging and depends on who you want to share your struggles with. For some, admitting to struggles is a sign of weakness, so they choose to live behind a thin veneer of pretense. The truth is that everyone has hard days and challenges they are dealing with. That’s just part of the human condition.

Answering the ‘How are you?’ question can also be a little tricky because you have to gauge the person asking you the question. Are they asking just to be polite, or do they really care and want to know?

If you feel they’re just asking to be polite, then the choice is yours. But if you think they really care, then if you’re having a down day, venture to share the truth.

Allowing yourself the freedom to express how you really feel can be difficult because there is a fear that you’ll be judged, but keep in mind that you’ll be judged either way. Everyone knows that no one is always great, so when you have the opportunity and safety to share how you really feel, then do so. You might just give someone else a safe place to share how they really feel, too.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, please share it with one person you love.

What is your self-care routine?

Do you have one, or are you just flying by the seat of your pants, hoping that your body and mind will keep up with you?

Self-care doesn’t mean spending a lot of time or money on yourself. It means devoting intentional time to rest and recuperation.

It means taking a few minutes every day to invest in your body and mind.

It means putting yourself first.

Self-care is important because it reminds you that you are important too.  And the feeling that you are important increases your self-worth which in turn directly affects how you show up for others.

Self-care is not about de-prioritizing other responsibilities. It’s about adding yourself to your list of responsibilities.

Your self-care routine could be as simple as taking a daily walk, spending a few minutes reading, or even a short meditation session. It could be something that says, ‘This is my time, and I’m going to spend it on me because I’m important too.’

So, get in the habit of carving out time for self-care. If you feel any guilt about taking time for yourself, as some people do, try to convince yourself that you’re doing it because it’ll make other people happier to be around you. In essence, you’re doing it for them, not you.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, please share it with one person you love.

What’s obvious to you?

When did it become obvious?

Is it obvious to everyone?

And, is it really obvious or only obvious to some?

Let’s look at a simple example.

When did it become obvious to you that water is wet?

Follow my thinking here.

You didn’t realize that water was wet until someone told you it was. You knew that if you touched water, you’d experience something, but you didn’t have a name for that experience or feeling until someone said something along the lines of if you do that, you’ll get wet. And you probably didn’t question the person who told you water is wet because there was some form of authority or power in your relationship with them.

But how about now? Are you still relying on what others tell you that should be obvious?

Obvious can be used as a limiting tool if you let it. You might think of it as an imaginary line in the sand that says to you, of course, you should know this, so don’t question it because no one else does.

When you find yourself saying or thinking something is obvious, question it for a moment, especially if you’ve never really encountered the situation before and are relying solely on the word of another. And refrain from telling others what should be obvious to them because what’s obvious to you is the sum of your unique life experiences, not theirs.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

What do you do when things don’t go as planned?

Do you panic?

Do you complain?

Do you give up?

Or do you buckle down and make a new plan?

Hardly ever have you heard of any personal or professional endeavor executed precisely as planned. In fact, more often than not, you’ll hear people say they had to correct course, improvise, or, in extreme situations, throw out the plan and create a new one.

Probably the only time you’ll experience or hear things going exactly as planned is on a production line where machines have been calibrated as tightly as possible and seldom involve human interaction.

Planning provides you with an estimation and rough roadmap that might help you achieve your goals, but planning doesn’t guarantee success.

Since things rarely go as planned, it doesn’t mean that planning is a waste of time. Planning allows you to think out loud. It enables you to think through and account for all the possible known impediments and perhaps even imagine some unknowns.

The experience of things not going as planned is not unique to you. So when things don’t go as planned, and you feel like giving up, hug yourself, say a few encouraging words, and then put your pen to paper and create a new plan.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

Have you ever heard of Slick Willie Sutton?

If yes, then good for you, but if you haven’t, no need to worry because I’m about to tell you who he was.

Slick Willie Sutton, aka Willie Sutton, was a bank robber who committed most of his crimes in the early 1900s.

So, what does a bank robber have to do with you?

Well, I’m glad you asked.

One day, a reporter asked Slick Willie why he robbed banks, and rumor has it that he replied, “Because that’s where the money is.”

Read that last line again.

That makes sense, right?

He went to where he would find what he was looking for because he had asked the right questions.

What are you looking for? And are you asking the right questions and searching in the right places for the answers?

Or are you practicing the Streetlight effect?

What is the Streetlight effect?

Here you go.

The Streetlight effect

A policeman sees a drunk man searching for something under a streetlight and asks what the drunk has lost. He says he lost his keys and they both look under the streetlight together. After a few minutes the policeman asks if he is sure he lost them here, and the drunk replies, no, and that he lost them in the park. The policeman asks why he is searching here, and the drunk replies, “this is where the light is”

While this is an amusing story, it drives home the point about looking in the right place and not where it’s easiest.

So when you’re out looking for solutions to problems or challenges, make sure you’re more like Slick Willie, asking the right questions, and less like the drunk who lost his keys.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

What if the way you think about another person were actually thoughts that redirected back to you?

Just like a well-thrown boomerang, your launched thought is now circling right back towards you.

If you believe that we’re all connected and originate from the same source, then technically, this is true.

Whenever you think negatively or positively about someone else, you’re thinking the same thing about yourself.

This doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t feel emotions when people behave a certain way because emotions are part of the human experience and add color to your life. What I’m talking about is more along the lines of conscious thinking.

When you’re going through your day and thinking about people, what do you say about them in your mind?

You know, when you’re in that moment when you conjure up a name in your mind, and you say they are…-that’s the instant.

That’s your opportunity right there.

That’s the moment when whatever you’re about to say about them – you’re about to say about yourself?

Is it possible or realistic to only have good thoughts about other people?

I can’t answer that for you.

But why not give it a try?

Ultimately, you can consider it a selfish act because those good thoughts are boomeranging back to you.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

How often do you argue with yourself?

If it’s never, then perhaps you should think about doing so.

And I don’t mean argue with yourself out loud because you might run the risk of being locked up.

What I’m talking about is getting in the habit of opposing one of your beliefs, ideas, or thoughts.

Taking the opposite side can give you a glimpse into why others don’t agree with you or see the world the way you do. It can also help you validate ideas more effectively.

In business, there is a concept of pre-mortem, which is very helpful for developing or inspiring new ideas. The objective of the pre-mortem is to explore reasons why a business might fail. The pre-mortem shines a light on potential challenges and hurdles and develops preparedness to address issues should they arise.

There is also a concept of red teaming. Red teaming is similar to a pre-mortem, except, in this case, a team of individuals takes an adversarial stance against an organization to expose vulnerabilities.

You can use either one of these tactics on your own beliefs and ideas.

Being open to being wrong is one of the keys to personal growth. The fact is, you will never have all the correct answers, and when you learn to accept this, your mind will be open to new ideas and options.

So, learn to argue against yourself. It will help you defend what you genuinely believe and enable you to discard ideas that are holding you back. 

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

Which one of these are you going to choose to believe?

Everything you worry about comes true.

Or.

Nothing you worry about comes true.

The first one is the rock. It offers you anxiety, stress, and tension.

The second one can be your soft place. It offers you comfort, relief, and solace.

These might not look like options you have, but they are.

Your default state is probably the first choice because that’s where most are programmed to live, but you can choose to reprogram yourself.

Some might say that choice number two is too Pollyanna-ish for them. They might be accurate, but the act of worrying doesn’t actually solve any problems either.

Not worrying is not the same as not acting or not preparing. In fact, it could be considered quite the opposite. If it helps you, write down the things you’re worried about, not so you can focus on them but to get them out of your head.

Carrying around constant anxiety about things that might never occur will eventually become exhausting, and it will take a toll on you and those around you.

So it’s up to you to make a choice between the rock and the soft place.

Neither is right or wrong, but one of them will allow you to enjoy the moments in your life a little more.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

Do you know what cartography is?

It’s the science or practice of drawing maps.

The famous explorers Lewis and Clark drew some of the earliest maps of the United States. In 1804, President Thomas Jefferson commissioned them to map the newly acquired western half of the North American continent.

How useful do you think those maps would be today?

There might be a handful of landmarks, such as rivers or perhaps a large mountain range, that still exist, but the landscape would look totally different for the most part.

Maps must be continuously updated, especially in rapidly changing environments. Even a map that is only a few years old can be outdated.

What about maps that seem to misrepresent?

The most popular world map used today is the Mercator map. The way this map is presented leads you to believe that the sizes of Europe and North America are more extensive than they are, and “visually speaking, Canada and Russia appear to take up approximately 25% of the Earth’s landmass when in reality they occupy a mere 5%.”

What if the map you’re using to guide your life is outdated or, even worse, misrepresents the truth?

What if you have unquestioningly adopted practices and patterns of thinking without updating them for the environment and time you’re living in?

Learn to question the maps you’ve been given and taught. Don’t fall for the ‘it’s always been this way.’ And remember, even when you have an up-to-date map, it only provides you with the layout of the land. It doesn’t show you all the impediments you might encounter on your own personal journey, and it doesn’t teach you how to handle them. To do that, you’ll have to create your own map. 

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.

What are the first words you say every morning?

Do you welcome the day with joy?

Do you express gratitude for being awake?

Do you tell someone you love them?

Or.

Do you mutter and grumble about having to wake up?

Or.

Do you ignore the first words you use to start your day?

Starting your day by expressing gratitude and love for yourself and others can set the tone for your entire day.

Your words are not a panacea and don’t make challenges and problems disappear but serve as a reminder that, just for that moment, all is okay.

It takes less than a minute to set your day or the day of someone you love on a positive course, so why not make the effort to do so?

If saying positive words out loud feels a little awkward at first then you can start by thinking of them aloud in your head, or even just whispering them, so only you can hear them.

The best part of starting your day with words of gratitude and love for yourself and others is that it sets your frame for how you see yourself and the person you’re thinking of.

Start your day tomorrow with beautiful, positive words for yourself and others. Practice it for a week and see how you feel.

What have you got to lose? If it doesn’t change anything, you can always go back to grumbling and muttering.

P.S. Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, do me a favor and share it with one person you love.