How quickly do you slip into self-protection mode?

If you’re not sure what self-protection is then let me help you, it’s the opposite of self-exposure. Essentially, self-protection is defense and self-exposure is vulnerability. If you’ve ever allowed yourself to share your true feelings with another person then you’re operating under self-exposure.

As a child your emotional distance between these two states usually starts out as being very wide, but as you move through life in to adulthood, the distance narrows based on your experiences.

When you’re in self-protection mode then you’re always looking for danger or threats. And this danger can be real or perceived. You feel as though people and situations are always out to get you and this feeling causes you to close up and become emotionally inaccessible.

One of the most detrimental effects of self-protection mode is disconnection between you and others, and the reason it’s bad for you is that we as a species are designed for connection.

Letting go of being in a self-protection mode can be difficult, especially if based on your previous experiences you feel as though it has served you well. And it might have, but it also has you in state of constant mental defense. It sets up emotional boundaries that doesn’t let others in, but also doesn’t let you out.

Moving from operating under a self-protection mode to self-exposure can be a difficult transition to make but doing so will allow you to experience deeper and more fuller relationships.

Vulnerability is hard and emotionally risky, and self-protection can appear to be the safe route to take. But it’s also hollow, unfulfilling, and the constant pressure of guarding yourself because you feel as though world is against you a hard way to go through life.

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