What’s your backstory?

What are your unique adventures and experiences that have made you, you?

What are the parts of your backstory that you’re proud of?

What are parts that you’re quick to hide?

Your backstory doesn’t have to hold you back, unless you let it.

Just like you, everyone you meet has their own unique backstory. They have their own moments they’re proud of and their own set of challenges.

Keep in mind that no one really knows your backstory, no one can see it but you, so don’t use it like a shield to hide behind.

Use your backstory to your advantage. Leverage all of your unique experiences.

Your backstory will always be a part of you, but doesn’t have to define who you’re going to be.

Did you see what he was wearing?

What was he thinking?

Why doesn’t she say hello?

Does she think she’s too good for me?

Why is he always happy?

He must have it so easy.

You are judging people all day long because it’s your nature.

Humans are constantly filtering for, is this person in the tribe or not.

You’re always thinking, asking if you can trust them or not.

And the judgment happens within a blink of an eye. The moment you see a person or hear them speak your brain goes on autopilot and starts judging.

This auto judging doesn’t give you the opportunity to get to know a person since you’ve already made decisions about them.

Not auto judging is hard because it takes time and effort.

It takes self-awareness.

Allow yourself to occasionally practice not judging, not jumping to conclusions about a person based on a moment’s interaction. You might be pleasantly surprised to find that your initial judgment about them was totally wrong, and they might even feel the same about you too.

Who’s going to be the lucky person in your day today?

The one person you’ll help today.

The one person you’ll be present for today.

The one person you’ll send good thoughts to today.

The one person you’ll forgive today.

The one person you’ll love without restraint or expectations.

The one person whose life might change because of their interaction with you today.

As you start your day today set an intention of improving just one person’s life and you’ll be surprised by the opportunities that will present themselves to you, that will allow you to make someone feel special.

Just imagine the difference we could make in the world if we all set our daily intention to improve the life of just one person.

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How does it feel to be out of your mind?

You know, that moment when you have an idea or thought that doesn’t’ fit within someone else’s thinking and they say ‘you’re out of your mind.’

Does it catch you off guard?

Do you question your sanity?

Or do give your idea the oxygen it needs and protect it from being smothered by the doubt of others?

If you’re a dreamer, idea generator and experimenter you will often hear some form of you’re out of your mind. And the truth is that at times you might be.

However, the secret is that you need to be out of your mind to see and create the new.

You can choose to always stay within the safe boundaries of your mind and have a perfectly wonderful life.

But you can also choose to occasionally stray beyond the confines of your mind just to see what you’re capable of thinking of, and you’ll know when you’re there because someone will be sure to tell you that you’re out of your mind.

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Have you heard of Mickey Mouse?

Chances are that if you’ve lived almost anywhere in the world during the past 50 years that you’re familiar with Mickey or have at least heard about Disney.

I’m a huge fan of Disney, to the point that I even wear a Mickey Mouse watch.

I wear it because it’s a constant reminder of what one man created with just a pencil and paper, the simplest of tools.

In today’s time of endless productivity tools and technology people often get caught up in either what tool to use or what they need in order to pursue their dreams.

I implore you not to get caught in this trap.

In fact I challenge you to start wherever you are.

If you’re reading this on your phone then use the notes app. If you’re at a desk then grab the first writing instrument and any, I repeat any piece of paper you can write on and start dreaming.

Just let your mind and hand work together without applying  judgement or any thinking that will slow them down.

Almost everything you see around you that is not created by nature probably came to life when the idea was first expressed on paper.

This exercise is not for you to create the next Disney. It is for you to allow yourself to imagine and then write out what it would look like to create your own wonderland.

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What are you taking for granted in your day today?

Some of the most simple creature comforts in your everyday life didn’t exist a hundred years ago even for the wealthiest of people.

Central air and heat

Computers and the internet

Indoor plumbing

Modern mattresses

Refrigeration

Running water

Stoves that work with a press of a button

Unlimited electricity

Individuals spent countless hours building and developing these things and now you can experience all of these modern day miracles before you even leave your home.

You also have

Community

Family and friends

Health

And then you have life itself.

Your ability to take long deep breaths of abundant clean air that gets processed by your body without you ever having to think about.

Even if you only think about all the beauty and miracles you experience within the first hour of your day you might be surprised at how much you’ve been taking for granted.

Stop for a moment today, and think about all that you take for granted. It might just remind you how fortunate you really are.

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What is on your to do list today?

Is it full of important tasks that will move to you towards your goals?

Let me be so bold as to add a few small tasks to your list.

Smile.

Stretch for one minute.

Drink water.

Tell someone you love and appreciate them.

Say hi to a stranger.

Let someone else go first.

Stand outdoors for one minute.

Sit still for one minute.

Take 6 deep breaths.

Be grateful for all that you have.

As you go through your day working on your big tasks, think of these small activities as the mortar used to fill the gaps between bricks.

The items that I’ve taken the liberty of adding to your list might not improve your health, or  get you that promotion, or even lead you to financial prosperity, but they will improve your journey towards your all of your goals.

Why do you expect them to understand you?

They don’t see what you see.

They don’t hear what you hear.

They don’t think what you think.

They don’t feel what you feel.

Your experiences are unique to you.

You will never be exactly aligned with anyone you know.

The sooner you realize this the freer you will be.

This doesn’t mean your life will be without challenges, but it does mean that you’ll find solutions that’ll be uniquely suited to your personality.

The best thing about living true to yourself is that you will begin to attract people that accept, appreciate and enjoy who you are.

And again, they might not always understand you, but that’s okay because you probably won’t understand them either.

If you’ve spent any time with computers or smartphones then you’ve seen a message that says something similar to ‘New Update Available.’

The manufacturer of the product you’re using is constantly updating the hardware and software of your device to provide you with optimum performance; this is especially true about the Operating System or OS of your device.

The OS is the computers version of a foundation. If the OS has problems then it doesn’t matter how great any of the software you install is, it will not perform to the best of its ability.

The same applies to you.

It will not matter how much education you acquire, books you read, information you gather, if you’re not constantly updating your own OS.

Your health and your mind are your OS and if you don’t take the time to work on them then you will be unable to perform to the best of your ability.

Take steps to work on yourself because you will not receive any messages about new updates being available, but you will begin to experience poor performance.

Don’t wait until it’s too late.

Create a minimum care plan for yourself, things that you can do for yourself on a regular basis. Think of the plan as new updates for your own OS.

Unlike your device your health and mind are the only ones you’ll have, so keep them as healthy as possible.

The first wealth is health. Ralph Waldo Emerson

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How do you get out of a rut?

How do you stop doing what you always do?

You start by stopping.

If you’ve ever had the wheels of your car stuck in mud then you know that the best thing to do is not to keep spinning your wheels.  The best things to do is stop and assess the situation and perhaps rock the car back and forth or put something under your tires to give you traction.

You can use similar tactics to get unstuck in life.

Rocking a car back and forth requires help from others and you probably wouldn’t hesitate to ask for help, then why hesitate when it comes to your life?

Reaching out for professional help in any area of your life is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of maturity and strength.

There are unlimited resources that can help you free yourself from whatever rut you’re stuck in. So, the sooner you stop spinning your wheels and get help, the sooner you’ll be unstuck and on your way again.

Are you ready for the unpredictable?

Ok, you can unfurrow your brows now.

Obviously you can’t be ready for the unpredictable because you don’t know what’s going to happen next.

Or can you?

What if there was a way to always be prepared for the unpredictable?

What if you could find a way to remain steady in the face of unpredictability?

There’s always a gap in time or space between an unpredictable event and your response, and you can learn to manage that space.

The key is to make the moments between the event and your response work to your advantage. And it starts with a decision.

Although at times it might not seem as though you don’t have time to decide how you’re going to respond, the reality is that you do. It’s just that in most cases you default to how you’ve always responded.

Practice not responding. Literally when you see or hear something, don’t respond.  Or respond in the opposite to how you would normally do so.

Quick caveat, you don’t have to tell anyone you’re doing this. This is just practice for you.

The more you practice the better you’ll become at handling unpredictable situations because you’ll learn that almost always it’s your response to the event rather than the event itself.

Also keep in mind that you’re already great at handling the unpredictable, it’s just the size of the unpredictable events that throws most people off.

How do you handle the ambiguity of life?

The times when the answers are along the lines of sometimes this will happen and at other times something else will occur.

Even the best, highest paid and brightest amongst us don’t know how things will turn out for sure.

What they can provide is their best educated guess in the moment. If you listen carefully you can hear them hedging their sentences with a sometimes this will happen and this is what we’re hoping for.

They use the word ‘sometimes’ sparingly knowing that you don’t want to hear them say it because you might lose confidence in them, but in their hearts they know that very little of what they do has any guarantees.

Life is all about ambiguity and although feeling sure about an outcome feels good; your feeling is only a mirage.

Learn to live and be comfortable not knowing what will happen next. After all, one aspect of life’s beauty is its ability to continuously surprise you.

Is there a limit to amount of food you can consume in a day before you get sick?

How do you know when you’ve eaten too much?

For most people their stomach sends a message to their brain saying there’s no more room in here, I need a break, and then it works on digesting the food.

What about your brain?

When it’s full where does it send a message saying that it needs a break and time to digest all the information it’s being fed?

Your brain might seem like a vessel with endless capacity, but it too needs time to collect itself and process all the information it’s fed.

Now you might say that your brain will process while you’re sleeping, and that’s true but why not give it some breaks throughout the day too.

Take breaks for your brain the same way you take breaks between meals.

You don’t have sit around for hours between activities but just a few minutes of focused breathing can be a wonderful reset for your brain between tasks.

Your brain breaks can also lead you to have new ideas and perspectives because you’re giving yourself time to digest all the information you’ve consumed.

Practice treating your brain the way you treat your stomach, and give it the breaks it deserves and needs.

Would you like a magic key to help you achieve your future goals?

Then memorize this question.

In fact say it out loud.

If I can do this then what else can I do?

Maybe it’s not quite a magical key but it will help build your inner confidence, and building your confidence to pursue new goals is half the battle.

The next time you come up against a challenge, obstacle or have a new goal, think about something you’ve succeeded in doing in your past. And don’t worry about the how big or small the goal was because if you begin to diminish the goal then by default you will diminish your confidence.

Remember how you approached your previous challenge and focus on how it felt once you had accomplished it.

The exercise of going back in to your memory enables you to shine a light on your natural talents and strengths which you can then re-apply on towards your new goals.

Use the key of building on your past wins and learn to leverage them to help you accomplish your future goals.

When does suffering come easy?

The idea of suffering being easy is probably not something you’re used to thinking about but yet it’s true for so many.

You see, suffering can sometimes be easy because change is hard.

So many suffer in poor health, bad relationships, spiritual emptiness and so many other areas of life because it’s easier than doing the work required to create change in their lives.

Suffering can be easier because there are endless external factors than can be blamed for the suffering. If the decision is made to change then the responsibility shifts from things that can’t be controlled to things that can, and this can be a huge burden.

If there’s something you’re suffering through just because it’s become easier to do so, then perhaps now’s a good time to re-evaluate.

The idea of change might seem daunting at first but you don’t have to go all in at once, you can ease in to it at your own pace. And if you decide at some point that you don’t like the change then you can always go back to the ease of suffering.

What’s holding you back?

If you can read and understand this blog post.

If you can perform simple arithmetic.

If you can get out of bed.

You’re already half way there.

There are high school dropouts running billion dollar companies.

There are illiterate individuals create amazing works of art.

There are individuals with physical limitations accomplishing amazing feats, such as a blind person climbing Mount Everest.

These people don’t focus on their limitations; they focus on what’s possible.

If I asked you to play the drums, even without any official training you know what the basic moves are. You’d probably take the drumsticks and start beating the drums and that’s the first 50% of playing the drums.

If I asked you to start a business, you’ve been in and around enough businesses to know the basic premise, now you just have to learn the details.

So learn to remove your internal limitations and view yourself in a new light.

Almost anything you want to do, you’re already half way there and have an understanding of the basic concepts, now all you need to do is fine tune and learn the other half.

What is Systems Engineering?

Well the official definition is “an interdisciplinary field of engineering and engineering management that focuses on how to design and manage complex systems over their life cycles.”

Now that’s a fancy definition.

All business organizations at their core are the same, they are all in business to make a profit. And they share many similar basic systems and functions but then they use systems engineering to customize and optimize to best suit their own organization.

People are also the same from DNA and functional perspective but then there’s customization when they find what works best for the individual.

So how does this apply to you?

Well, you’re a complex system and you need to learn to manage yourself over your own life cycle.

If you want to accomplish anything you need a system to do so. Now you can get things done in an ad-hoc, loose format but even that is a system.

An effective system is one that works for you.

STOP. Read the previous statement again.

Now you can adopt some elements of other people systems but there’s always going to be degree of customization based your own individual personality.

As your own system engineer you need to be able to identify your weaknesses so that you can best accommodate for them and your strengths so that you can leverage them quickly.

So awaken your inner engineer and start engineering systems that you can use to design a life customized just for you.

Shhhhhh.

Can you hear that?

It’s your mind.

What’s it saying?

What is that little voice in your head up to?

Is it on your side or against you?

Is it telling you all the things you can do, or is saying ‘you can‘t do that?’

Does it whisper ‘they’re watching you,’ so you better not mess up, or does it say ‘they’re always going to watch you so go ahead and give it your best shot?’

The little chatterbox in your head will never go away. Sometimes it might seem as though it’s gone quiet but it’s just waiting for the right opportunity to speak up. And you already know when that is, right when you’re about to ‘step out of line.’

So how do you handle the voice in your head?

You recognize it, appreciate it for its input and then decide what you want to do.

If what it’s saying moves you towards the kind of person you want to be and the life you want to live then great, but if not, then remind it that you’re the one in control.

Do you have a role model?

Is there someone that you look up to or try to emulate?

When you’re looking at someone as a role model it’s more than likely you’re admiring the results they’ve created for themselves.

If you ask people about role models many will rattle of names of famous people yet the majority of the best role models will be everyday people that no one has heard of.

Having a role model can be wonderful but it can also be tricky. Once you see someone in a particular light you tend to focus on their one or two outstanding traits that you admire. However, if they falter in other areas of their life it can be disheartening for you.

Modeling another person’s behavior is also extremely complicated and almost impossible because their individual genetic makeup is unique to them. However you can find ways to create similar results in your life by watching them and then leveraging your unique traits to do so.

Choose your role models carefully and don’t forget their journeys are always different than yours. And keep in mind that you too someday might have the responsibility of being a role model for someone else.