How often do you play whodunit?

Whodunit is colloquial slang for who has done it and is most commonly known for its use in crime or murder mystery stories. Essentially, it’s asking the question of who’s the culprit or who to blame for a crime.

But, there’s a version of whodunit, that you might, at some time or another, engage in when you’re looking for someone to blame for a challenge or problem that you’ve encountered. You look for an aggressor because you’ve adopted a victim mentality.

Before I continue, let me be clear that I’m certain there are times when your claim of being a victim is legitimate, and you should seek judgment for actions taken against you. But hopefully, these times are few and far between.

It’s easy to fall into the trap or even habit of blaming others for your misgivings and tribulations because it shifts responsibility from you to someone else. And, of course, it allows you to seek attention and sympathy from others.

While blaming others might seem easy, it actually undermines your self-confidence and weakens your self-efficacy. However, shifting from whodunit to a version Idunit, yes, I just made that up on the fly, helps you take ownership of your life. And the sooner you take a position of owning or being responsible for your actions, the sooner you’ll shift from a victim mentality to a creator and, in some cases, even a victor state of mind.

So, the next time something goes wrong in your life, ask yourself how you contributed to the situation instead of looking for whodunit. Find how you also are to blame, not for the sake of self-flagellation, but to learn and regain control of that area of your life. As time goes by, you’ll find that the less you blame others, the more you’ll feel in command of your own life.

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